And another offensive instance

The posting that won't die.

This might be what I have

When I was at my worst, I had many -- maybe even most -- of the symptoms of borderline personality disorder. However, many of the descriptors didn't quite fit -- though I am reckless in many ways I never intentionally cut or physically harmed myself.

This article argues that anger itself may be a mental illness. Actually it calls it "dysregulated anger," and that rings right for me. I'm not convinced it should be a diagnosis in and of itself, but maybe it's a sub diagnosis, or sister diagnosis to borderline personality disorder? What do you think?

Or hold an ice cube in your hand

When I feel dysregulated -- like my emotions are once again ruling me, one strategy is to use sensory stimulation to short-circuit my senses. Somehow this also short-circuits my brain into forgetting for a split second that it's dysregulated, and can help break the cycle, the downward spiral into certain disaster.

Seems a treatment center is experimenting with a similar strategy.

It haunts me, too

Eclipse had a sleepless night, a scary dream and isn't sure what's real when she tosses back and forth.

The experience of coming out of sleep crying is one I experience often. I am sometimes aware of what it is that hurts so much, but often I am weeping about something known only in my mind.

What's causing the river of tears down my cheeks right this minute is the Fleetwood Mac anthem Eclipse quotes in her post. She can't get the melody out of her head, for me it's going to be the words. I must have heard this song a million times but until now didn't understand.

It's my story. Like Stevie Nicks I once thought the chain was unbreakable, too.

Listen to the wind blow
Watch the sun rise
Run in the shadows
Damn your love
Damn your lies
And if
You don't love me now
You will never love me again
I can still hear you saying
You would never break the chain.

Yet another misdirected blogger

She calls it a blog about religion, politics and the occult. Where insulting people who suffer from mental illness and/or personality disorders comes in is a little beyond me. It appears this "Christmas Carol" is posted when people can't think of anything original to write.

http://sillielizziesrock.blogspot.com/2006/12/christmas-carols-for-mentally-disturbed.html

Here we go

I find misinformation about borderline personality disorder to be annoying, offensive and usually pretty invalidating.

I also try to understand why people -- many of them highly educated -- would find it funny to post jokes or insults about the personality disorder.

This blog is a place I can chronicle the blunders and, hopefully, add a little perspective.