I feel so edgy.
Like I'm late for something, only I'm not. Like I owe someone money, but I don't. Like I forgot to take something out of the oven, or that there's something I should be doing but I don't know what it is and don't have the energy to actually do it anyway.
I feel a big knot in my stomach, and it's just there, present, not causing me pain or anything but just present.
I feel lost and alone and not sure where to go today or what to do with myself. I have plenty I should be doing, could be doing, wish I was doing. But instead I'm just sitting here contemplating my knot and worrying about it.
How can I find relief?
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Borderline personality disorder is a diagnosis full of pain and fear. Yet it also brings relief, for it is highly curable with a combination of work, desire and time. What doesn't help is the proliferation of erroneous and offensive information about the disorder. If you see such information on the Web, tell me and I'll counter it here. I'm an expert on how it feels to have this disorder, and how it feels to have the World's Best Therapist(tm) treat me with dialectical behavioral therapy.
Find the Dialectic
NOT BLACK, NOT WHITE. SOMEWHERE IN THE MIDDLE.
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About Me
- Just Me
- Borderline personality disorder is a diagnosis full of pain and fear. It also brings relief, for it is highly curable with a combination of work, desire and time. What doesn't help is the proliferation of erroneous and offensive information about the disorder. If you see such information on the Web, tell me and I'll counter it here. I'm an expert on how it feels to have this disorder, and how it feels to have the World's Best Therapist(tm) treat me with dialectical behavioral therapy, an amazing treatment developed at the University of Washington by Dr. Marsha Linehan. That's what you'll find in my blog -- upfront information countering some of the misinformation out there. You will also see into my heart as I answer these things, and as I live, for I am emotionally sensitive, one of the traits of this disorder. I want this blog to be one of the places I don't have to be ashamed of having BPD. One of the places where I can be Just Me.
1 comment:
I understand what you are going through! I feel that way right now, and the Klonopin doesn't seem to help; it's jut making me sleepy.
I don't know how to help you. I too am searching for the answer, but I want to let you know that you are not alone. I do feel for you. Someone "out there" not only empathizes but understands (to a point) too. I hope that, in itself, helps somewhat.
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